There is always something making the rounds on Facebook. Last week a request from breastfeeding mothers popped up asking others to search for something positive related to ‘breastfeeding is…’ on Google in an effort to have positive auto-fill options for breastfeeding searches instead of ‘gross, exhausting’ etc coming up first.
My husband came home the other night and I asked if he could sterilize a pin for me. His first question was not curiosity or questioning or ‘why?’ but: “flame or alcohol?”
For that reason, I love him dearly.
(My answer was ‘flame please’)
Are you wondering yet what I decided to pierce? Don’t worry: I didn’t pierce any of my body parts myself in high school and I have no intention of starting now.
When I explained that I needed it to rupture a bleb his curiosity kicked in.
‘That weird white thing on my nipple’ I explained.
‘Oh’ was his only response and off he went to sterilize the pin.
Yes I intentionally stuck a pin in my nipple. If Dr. Newman, Canada’s own breastfeeding guru says I can, I can. It was painful but no more painful than the milk blister (bleb) that’s been plaguing me for the last five weeks. Once I figured out what that sucker was I wanted it gone. So now I’m soaking it and disinfecting it and hoping the damn painful bulge goes away.
But I wouldn’t type in ‘breastfeeding is painful’ into Google because the whole situation was ridiculously funny.
Breastfeeding is funny. Comical even.
Maybe it’s because I’ve nursed three babies. Maybe it’s because I’ve been a mom for 6 and a half years. Maybe it’s my dark sense of humour. Sticking a pin in my nipple, which was already throbbing with pain, was funny to me because really, who does that?
So in response to the nipple poking I would type “Breastfeeding is worth it”
“Mo-om you’re dripping water on my head!” shrieks the monkey.
When he’s 16 I’ll tell him it was breast milk and not water.
Breastfeeding is funny
I’ve compared how far milk has sprayed from my own breasts with other nursing mothers. Super soakers have nothing on us.
Gross? Absolutely not. Have you ever listened to your husband/brother/friend brag about writing his name in cursive in the snow?
Breastfeeding is a superpower
If baby duck isn’t being held he objects. There are brief moments we have to put him down or I can’t get to him fast enough or his brothers demand their share of my attention. He cries, loudly, and I’m usually informed by one (if not both of my children):
“He’s sad mom. He needs milk”. “I’ll just snuggle him” I say. “No, milk will make him feel better. Give him that”
Breastfeeding is love.
Both kids got sick within two weeks of baby duck coming home.
“Oooh keep them away from the baby” I was told (again and again).
I certainly wasn’t letting them lick his face but they were still welcome to love their brother. Breastfeeding him meant I knew he had my immunity to keep him healthy.
Breastfeeding is protection.
A friend kindly lent me her super-duper breast pump before the baby duck was born. On a quiet afternoon when my husband was home I set about getting it hooked up and seeing if I could get some milk stored away for future
use escapes. The look on the firefighter’s face when he sneaked into the family room and saw the contraption at work made me grateful that school was out for the year. Oh the stories he would have told his teacher and classmates.
“Just like the cows at the farm!” he exclaimed.
Breastfeeding is (eye-rollingly) funny.
Sometimes it’s painful and exhausting and gross (cracked nipples anyone?) but everything worthwhile usually is. My children make my ears and heart hurt. They are exhausting. And gross? There are three boys: the smells and bodily fluids alone would make many choose lifelong celibacy.
Out of curiosity I just Googled ‘Motherhood is…’ and the first answer that came up
‘Not for wimps’
Clearly we mothers have some work to do on Google.